WAMBANGO DAILY NEWS ISSUE 1001 THOUGHT FOR THE DAY : As long as it fires ammunition and it fires lots of it, who cares? NOW ONLY $10    FIDO'S     BITE  MAKES LIONS LICK WOUNDS From Daniel Ukulele in Mpala Farm   Mpala Farm has been freed from oppression by the victorious forces of the Free Intervention for Democratic Order.  Led by General Hertzog "Hertz" van Rental the forces of FIDO routed the dictatorial rabble of the NSRF.   MYSTERY SUPERPOWER INVOLVED  IN THE AFFAIRS OF WAMBANGO   Early reports suggest that FIDO troops have won a great victory over the numerically superior Mbore Lions.  The pitiful remnants of their force were last seen heading for the border with Maralal in headlong retreat. Further military success came to FIDO in Dol Dol where all fled before them as they released the region from years of hardship and oppression under the regime of the late President Daniel "Yellow" Banana.   Disturbing reports have been reaching the capital surrounding the involvement of a foreign power in the interal politics of this country.  Military movements in the northwest are thought to be connected with this but denied by the LO'ONE         RELIGIOUS FERVOUR BREAKS OUT IN ISIOLO AND SAMBURU   Man at PLO Direct from the catwalks of Beirut 55 West Bank Wanguru     Military Intelligence experts have described the defeats suffered as being "a right good kicking".  They went on to say that the LRDC was likely to have trouble retaining water let alone Ltumo.  This has meant that the LRDC has had to flee from Wambango to the comparative safety of Wogga-Wogga.  It is however expected that they will make further     attempts to destabilise  the region after a period of rest and recuperation.  A SFRZ spokesman was quick to point out that their victory was a sign from God,and that the faithful would be rewarded with entry into Babylon.  The exact nature of the religious fervour is unknown but rumours suggest that the deity may be called Ganja    SFRZ soldier relaxes after the battle The Sword Federation for the Retention of Zogra has made great gains against the populist forces of the Ltumo Retention Defence Commando (LRDC).